Words
can't adequately express the insurmountable love and joy my husband and I feel
about our darling angel, Grace. Our sweetheart was born on Tuesday, June
30th at 4:22pm, and she is absolutely perfect. From the labor,
to the delivery, to seeing her and holding her in my arms for the first time,
to hearing her little cry, to seeing her little smile, my life has changed
forever in the most beautiful and profound way.
It
all began Monday, June 29th, with a visit to my doctor at which time she
informed me I was still 3cm dilated, same as the week before, and 80% effaced.
She was convinced I would go into labor any day now, but just to be safe,
we scheduled an appointment to induce me the following week in case I needed
it. Sean said to me as we were walking out of the doctor's office, "Perhaps
that's exactly what your subconscious needs to get things moving."
Boy, was he right. That evening my contractions started to get a
little more intense.
Around
3am on Tuesday morning, I was jolted awake by a very strong contraction.
They were still pretty far apart at this point, but I knew my body was
going into labor. From that point on, Sean and I didn't get much sleep.
We labored at home until about 7am, when my contractions started getting much
closer together. We practiced everything we learned from our Bradley
Method classes, including walking, breathing, massage, laboring on the birthing
ball, squatting, and more. I also made
sure to eat something, rest, and take a warm shower.
By
8am, my contractions were 2-4 minutes apart, lasting at least 60 seconds.
If they continued like this for an hour or two, that would be our queue
to go to the hospital. We knew it was imminent, so Sean took the pups to
the doggie hotel where they would stay for a few days. When he came back,
I said it was go time! I will never forget the drive to the hospital.
It was only 15 minutes, but it was the most beautiful day! The sky
was bright blue with not one cloud in sight, and the sun was shining ever so
brightly. Sean and I both said to each other that it was the perfect day
for our daughter's birth day.
We
checked in at the hospital around 10:15am, and they admitted me right away.
When they got me into my triage room and examined me, I was 4cm dilated and
nearly 100% effaced. Sean's mom, who was my doula, arrived shortly
thereafter. Per my birth plan, I did not want to be strapped down to a
fetal monitoring machine because I wanted to move around and labor in various
positions that were comfortable to me.
The nurses were great in honoring this, and so I labored while standing
and made sure to walk in between contractions.
At this point, when a contraction hit, I was most comfortable standing
and bending over the bed. Sean massaged
me and made sure to keep me relaxed, while my mom-in-law played music and
talked to me.
An
hour later, I was moved to our labor and delivery room, where we met our
wonderful nurse, Gerri. She was out-of-this-world and took extra great
care of us! Coincidentally, our
photographer, Lisa of SisterLee Photography, is Gerri's niece! They had
no idea they were working the same patient/client until we all were in the same
room. What a small world! We gave Gerri a copy of our birth plan
and let her know that I did not want any drugs, including an epidural, nor did
I want to be strapped down for fetal monitoring unless we were concerned Grace
was in distress. Gerri enthusiastically
said no problem, and let me labor in the room however I was comfortable. She honored everything in our birth plan. She was incredible!
Shortly
after settling into our L&D room, Gerri wanted to check my dilation. As she did, she looked at me with excitement
and said, “Dang girl! You’re already
9cm!” Grace was also very low at this
point; she was at a +2 station (the birthing stations are on a scale from -3 to
+3). Gerri also let me know that my bag
of waters was bulging and that we had two options: I could labor and see if it broke on it’s
own, which could take a few hours, or she could break it for me, which would
speed up the labor but make it more intense.
Without hesitation and a big smile on my face I replied, “Let’s break
it!” I didn’t feel anything as she broke
it, but as soon as she did, I felt a warm sensation in my pelvic area. Here we go!
And she was right…my contractions grew closer together and became much
more intense. I channeled the pain from
each contraction and used it as a power source to bring Gracie down and closer
to greeting the world. I knew with each
contraction, I was that much closer to meeting my daughter.
Things
started to get significantly more intense.
As it turns out, my bulging bag of waters had stretched my cervix to
9cm, so when we popped it, my cervix shrunk down to 7cm. After breaking my water, I labored for three
excruciating hours where my contractions were one on top of the other with
hardly a minute in between. I couldn’t
get comfortable so for a while I moved frequently changing my labor positions. I labored in the shower with warm water
running over me, in a squatting position, on my hands and knees, sitting on the
toilet, and laying on my side, all the while with Sean holding my hand, rubbing
my back, rubbing my head, and speaking calming and loving things to me. His mom was unbelievable as well. She had relaxing music playing and talked me
through each contraction by telling me to focus on certain instruments in the
songs, and helping me to control my breathing.
After
an hour of laboring in various positions, I had to lie in bed on my side. My contractions were so strong that I
couldn’t move anymore, and Grace was so low that my body’s natural instinct was
to push, however I couldn’t yet because I wasn’t completely dilated and didn’t
want to tear. My mom-in-law held my hands
and we were face to face for every contraction with her breathing deep while I
mimicked her to keep me from hyperventilating.
There were times I squeezed her hands so hard I thought I broke
them. Sean continued to rub my back and
speak calming things to me. They kept me
focused, calm, and most importantly, they kept me breathing. There were a couple times I almost lost focus
and almost lost my breath, but my mom-in-law brought me back to deep breathing
before I lost control. I remember going
into an almost trance-like state of mind, an out-of-body experience of sorts.
My
dad and his fiancée, Jodi, arrived. He
said he couldn’t wait anymore, that he had to be at the hospital with his
little girl. He was in the room with me,
and having him there gave me a surge of energy and strength that I can’t
describe. I knew mom was with me
too. I had been talking to her in my
head throughout my labor, but when my dad arrived, I felt my mom with him, and
their strength empowered me to push through the indescribable pain that came
with each contraction. He and Jodi
stayed in the room with me until the end, and I’m so glad they did.
About
3 hours after we broke my water, the pressure in my pelvic area was nearly
unbearable, and the urge to push was now impossible to resist. I looked at Gerri and said, “I’m a 10, I know
it!” She measured me, and sure enough, I
was dilated to 10cm! It was time to
push! Gerri had already set everything
up and my doctor arrived right away. I
asked for a mirror so I could see my little darling emerge. I gave one big push and there was her
head! I remember seeing a black, slimy
ball! It was her. It was my daughter! I couldn’t believe how much hair she had and
how dark it was! We thought she’d be a
little blondie or red-haired girl. I
gave a second big push and felt a huge relief of pressure in my pelvis. Her head was out!! With the next contraction I pushed again, and
out popped her shoulders and the rest of her body. She was here, and she was perfect. She was so alert with her eyes open. The doctor called Sean over to cut the cord,
and so he did. Then they immediately
placed Gracie on my chest, and I felt an insurmountable feeling of love and
joy. She latched on to my boob right
away and fed for the next hour and a half!
Sean and I cried tears of joy. This
little bundle was ours. We had a
daughter. After years of trying, our
dream of starting our family finally came true.
We couldn’t stop staring at her with her chubby cheeks, full cupid lips,
deep blue eyes, full head of hair, and teeny tiny feet and hands. She weighed a perfect 7lbs 2oz, and was 18.5”
long. My brother had just arrived and
came into the room with us. There was
never so much love in a single room as there was in this moment. Me, Sean, my mom-in-law, my daddy, my
brother, my soon-to-be-step-mom were all crying tears of joy with the biggest
smiles on our faces. We were in complete
awe of this darling little being that I just brought into the world. I’ve never been so happy in all my life.
Everything
about my labor and birth went so smoothly and I am so grateful for that. Sean and I prepared, mentally, physically,
and emotionally, and it paid off. I gave
birth without drugs, without tearing, and without an episiotomy. My “drugs” were my husband and his mom and
all the relaxation and breathing techniques we had practiced for months on
end. That was the way I wanted to give
birth, and so we did it. I could not
have done it without my husband as my coach as my mom-in-law as my doula. They kept me calm, focused, relaxed, and
determined. It was a quick labor, as I
only labored at the hospital for 6 hours, and only pushed for about 10
minutes. Grace was ready to greet the
world, and the world was ready to meet her :)
Below
is a quick birth story video (don’t worry, it’s very classy and tasteful) along
with some pictures our photographer took.
She captured the beauty, pain, fatigue, strength, and love during the
labor and birth of our sweet angel, and I’m beyond happy.
Photos taken by Sisterlee Photography
